Assumptions Make Everyone Equally Unhappy

By William May
Published: 02/27/16 Topics: Self Improvement Comments: 0

 

Jerry Belson, Hollywood writer, director and producer is created with coining the phrase, "Never assume, because when you assume, you make an ass of you and me."

In the age of internet, instant information and fast communication there is no reason to make stupid rude assumptions. So why does it seem like there are more asinine assumers than ever before?

Could it be that the ability to write flame emails, make anonymous online posts, and assail people behind their backs knowing the target of their vile have no way to respond, as caused an explosion of insensitivity? Are assumers just cowards who would never have dared to confront people face to face?

Here are a few doozey's in the lodging managing business, all delivered with anger:

Guest: "I just assumed there would be Internet in this house, even though its 40 miles from the nearest town."

Property Owner: "I just assumed the guests would not mind if I remodeled the bathroom while they were there."

Guest: "I just assumed it would be OK to invite a couple dozen drunken friends for a party as long as they did not stay the night."

Property Owner: "I just assumed you would not charge me for looking for my lost phone, even though its an hour or two round trip."

None of these examples are terribly important but they are improperly presumptive and often delivered with an air of superiority all intend to make lodging, food and other service personnel like slaves.

So why do seemingly intelligent, professional adults treat others so badly?

Some feel a misguided sense of entitlement. Others take frustration in their lives out on anyone who is handy. Some blame others for their intellectual inability to solve problems. Some want to feel elite by making other feel inferior.

But mostly - assuming something before asking questions requires an emotional maturity that some people just never learned from parents, friends, spouses or coworkers. Until someone confronts them, they will continually increase their asinine behavior unabated.

So how to avoid making an ass out of yourself and others?

Follow the golden rule, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.."

Get the facts before making assumptions. Ask questions before making assumptions. Never assume you are right, or the other person is wrong. It’s the adult thing to do. The courteous thing to do.

Jerry Belson would have agreed with Abraham Lincoln who said, "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt."

Author: William May, MayPartners Inc.
Blog #: 0491 – 02/27/16